Just thinking back to the weekend, where I went out and umpired two games of cricket without too many problems at all.
Why is this so? If I can say one thing that being diagnosed as autistic has given me, it’s the ability to concentrate for long periods, especially on one goal or objective. The one objective that springs to mind is that I want to have a trouble free game with all my decisions correct. This I think I managed to achieve over the weekend.
When I’m concentrating while umpiring, you could say “I’m in the bubble”, or in a cocoon, or I have my game face on. There are lots of phrases to describe this, but in the bubble seems to be an apt descriptor.
It seems that when things go perfectly, I’m able to relax and enjoy the afternoon. Of course, this isn’t always the case. There will be difficulties on occasions. I’m a firm believer in doing the basics right, if I manage to do the basics correctly during a game of cricket, then everything else seems to take care of itself, generally speaking.
No substitute for experience of course, but I never get complacent and am always learning about my own character and what I can do better. This applies to life in general too, but I have my bad days, as you all well know. If I am in a bad place generally over a sustained period, I won’t partake in any activities and keep myself isolated. Despite waking up today and not feeling brilliant, it’s only a temporary thing today and I’m back to normal now.
To summarise, I’m in quite a good place generally at the moment, hence my activities are good and varied. My down moments are only temporary and I’m able to keep myself ok with activities such as umpiring and volunteering. I aim to try to keep well for most of this year, the first four months of the year have been ok, punctuated by the occasional bursts of low mood and anxiety. Thankfully they’ve been kept to a minimum, and at the moment, things aren’t too bad. They could always be better!
Life is never flat, there are always ups and downs with me. Umpiring gives me a boost, being around those who respect me gives me a boost, volunteering and peer support gives me a boost. It’s nice to feel appreciated!