Shall I, shan’t I? Everyday decisions and other musings…

Afternoon. I look out of my flat at an angry sky, ready to vent it’s feelings on this particular part of London. 

I ventured out today, though I was in two minds about doing so. Had a spot of volunteering to do at the cafe. I was deciding between going and not letting down my colleague, or staying in and letting her down. I chose the former, though it was touch and go.

Any reason for that indecision? I’ve not been waking up particularly early of late, so an early start this morning caught me out a little. Not quite attuned to early starts at the moment. 

The journey was uneventful. I have a pre planned routine of bus and train connections. That’s my autism coming into play. If that chain of connections is broken, I ain’t a happy bunny. But all was well today. 

The session of volunteering went well, except for one quite unnerving moment. An unshaven gentleman walked past the cafe and stopped at the window. His particular target for his gaze was me. Can’t think why, unless I sold him a dodgy cheese sandwich once upon a time. The guy proceeded to mutter, and it’s a good job I’m rubbish at lip reading. I’ve no idea what he said, thankfully, and he moved on while I returned to my duties. 

Consider this. The place where I volunteer is a mental hospital. He could have been one of the patients. He certainly wasn’t staff or security. He certainly must have found me fascinating to stare at me and mutter something incomprehensible. If only he knew that I’m not that fascinating. An odd moment in a decent morning. 

Back again tomorrow.

Allen Brooks xx


Author: allenbrooks44

44 year old adult living with Autism...

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