Christmas 2010…

Several months earlier, my world was in turmoil. Mum had passed away in June of 2010, and I was struggling to come to terms with that event and others that were going on at a similar time.

Usually at Christmas, I go to my sister or nephew for dinner. This particular year, it was at sister’s. How would I cope? This will be the first Christmas without Mum. 

The day arrived. I remember the day, it was the tail end of a very cold spell of weather. I wasn’t in the greatest frame of mind, emotions were swirling around in my head. It was time for dinner. I sat there, but there was a vacancy never again to be filled. Normally I would eat my dinner without too many problems. This time, I left half of it. The appetite was gone. I wasn’t enjoying this at all.

At future Christmasses, I tried to shut out all the bad memories, with some measure of success. I don’t enjoy that time of year, and it is very difficult to push myself through to the New Year. But I must have been strong to have lasted this far. Another test of my mental fortitude is on the way in a few months time, and the weather outside this summer’s day speaks only of winter. Dark, gloomy and with foreboding. I have to cope each and every day. There’s no other choice. 

Allen Brooks xx


Love this time of year….

I do. Very much. The lighter mornings, the lighter evenings, the warmth of the sun but the freshness of the air to remind us it’s still February. It’s that boundary between winter and spring and the battle that goes on that makes the time of year one of hope and enjoyment. 

Gone is the gloom and the dark, depressing days of mid winter. Just hate those days. Before Christmas wasn’t a good time, but everyone is expected to be happy and to put on a persona that things are ok. I muddled through, I went on holiday to Spain for a week, to escape the dullness and the cold of an English winter. 

And here I am, out of the other side. 

Peace and love 

Allen Brooks