What’s been going on?

Hello. Yesterday was Peer Support day. There were eight of us and it was extremely enjoyable, as always.

Then it was off to music bingo, where my ears took a real hammering. The punters poured in from far and wide and the host got rid of the tickets in very little time, illustrating the pulling power of the event.

Though me or my friend and colleague didn’t win, it was difficult hearing the songs at times because of the raucous cacophony of the audience and by the end, my ear drums were crying enough. It was also a warm evening and the atmosphere inside the pub was extremely close and muggy. Not the most comfortable of evenings, but enjoyable all the same. 

I collapsed into bed, but awoke at 3 in the morning to my legs itching like mad. I must have spent ages virtually scratching them to pieces. What caused this I’m not too sure, but again, the tablets could be the culprit. I managed to get off to sleep, and the sound of one of our work friends and colleagues walking through the door awoke me about 9. Those bacon rolls and cup of tea are too good to resist!

This afternoon, I ran a bath, but I decided to catch up on the sleep I missed out on last night. Tummy troubles? Some slight ones this afternoon, but I think my digestive system is getting used to the increase in medication. I have slept rather well though. 

Well, that’s it. See you later.

Allen Brooks xx

Determined to enjoy Thursday…

Morning. No tummy troubles this morning and I’m a little more compos mentis than is normal of a morning time.

Peer Support group today and a chance to thank everyone for showing up at my birthday do last Saturday. And tonight, it’s back to Music Bingo. I’m determined to enjoy this particular Thursday. I need to come out of the other side of yet another period of illness. Today will help.

Allen Brooks xx

Happy birthday to me…well not quite yet..

  

I’m forever searching for some decent people in the world and today I found some, at the Peer Support group.

It was a rocky start to the day. I must confess to feeling a bit zonked out when I awoke at 7.30 this morning. Managed to kick myself into gear and get to the local cafe for a big, hearty breakfast. This didn’t have a great deal of effect at first. I felt as though I was on autopilot, like an aircraft. I reached my destination, at the office, but not sure how I managed that.

Nice to be running a pleasant little gathering of 8 people this morning. All was well when my second in command told us the manager wanted to see us and the group to be wrapped up early. I agreed to this, until somebody mentioned there was a birthday cake on the way! Now my birthday is on Saturday, and in walked the manager with a cake, a card and an indoor pot plant! Wonderful. I felt somewhat embarrassed, but it was nice to feel valued and liked by the company. It was a nice surprise. 

The real thing is on Saturday, and I will be tucking in to some of the cake between now and the weekend. The others in the group shared some slices between them, I can’t eat it all myself! I was also informed that the six candles signified ten years each! Cheeky. But I must confess to feeling that old of late.

Nice to have a pleasant surprise like that, and to share it with some great people.

Allen Brooks xx

Pieces of Eight…

Peer Support day today. And for a change, I was feeling in a very chipper mood, laughing and joking with everyone. After a slow start, there were eight of us, including some that have taken a break from attending, it was nice to welcome them back. 

It went well, there were a lot of laughs today, in fact there was a lot more levity than last week, which was a tough session with some serious issues. That’s the beauty of each week, it’s different and presents different challenges to the facilitators.

After a slow start, I feel ok today. I’ve had three good days in a row…some sort of record, but it’s nice to be back in the room again.

Laters

Allen Brooks xx

A week is a long time…

In politics, in peer support, in everything really. Remember last week when I flounced out of the Peer Support meeting because of various issues? Well, this week saw myself in charge, so time to recoup some losses after last week.

And it went very well, by and large. It was a small group, but we discussed some very sensitive and difficult issues today, proving the adage that every week in the Peer Support group is different. Some weeks we can have fun and laugh together, but today was altogether more serious and heavy going. But it was a pleasure to be there and to erase the memories of last week. 

I feel better generally this week, despite the strange day I had on Tuesday. Early mornings and a bit more structured sleep has improved my well being so far this week. Still plenty of hard work still to do before I’m out of this latest crisis. I’m trying hard, I really am.

Music Bingo and a raucous night at the pub coming up. Could do with a laugh, so looking forward to that. My work colleague and sparring partner is back after a short absence. It’s good to see her back in the fray. I’ve had no one to take the mickey out of! Ha ha. 

Good day so far, hoping that continues.

Allen Brooks xx

All good clean fun…

Morning. Welcome to my not so dull existence. I was woken from my slumbers during the middle of the night by the sound of my phone notifying me of people liking my blog posts. Especially a site called DAZZLED from Australia. I must say a huge thanks to him/her, and for liking my content. Very much appreciated.

It’s the first day of the school holidays today, and two teenage girls were probably better off staying in school, learning some manners and showing some respect to their elders and betters. There was some incident on the train into work today, there was a lot of shouting and gesticulating, and some angry reactions from a couple of other passengers. If I could have introduced to them the group of teenagers I saw yesterday, then the two pea brains would have seen how to treat people with respect and manners. I always think that if you’ve got nothing worthwhile to say, then shut up.

Still, I wasn’t involved, but it’s never good to see. Off now to Peer Support, hoping for a non repeat of last week’s drama. I’m running it today, so that could be a case of famous last words. I know how the captain of the Titanic felt when the ship went down. Let’s hope it stays afloat today.

Bye 

Allen Brooks xx

Losing my mind…

What started off as a routine day has seen yours truly blow a gasket. Big time. But thankfully all has been sorted out and we are all adults, and things have been resolved amicably.

Let me explain some context. Being autistic, I absolutely abhor routine disruption, with anything, whoever has been disrupting. If a bus is late, I get annoyed, if a train is late, I get annoyed. And so we come to the Thursday Peer Support Group.

I was deputising to one of my colleagues today, and to be brief, I thought that the regular routine was being disrupted. It wasn’t done maliciously or with intent to upset me in the slightest, it just so happened that I thought things were going wrong.

Instead of stopping the process and being polite and dealing with the situation, I walked out. I felt that I wasn’t needed there. All sorts of irrational thoughts were going through my head, I left my colleague to continue on her own and I stormed off home, with steam coming out of my ears.

Again, on the way home, silly thoughts were going through my head. I lost the power to think rationally, all because of routine disruption. I cannot cope with it.

Thankfully, wiser heads prevailed and the issue has been resolved through a very frank and honest discussion. I’m not 16 anymore and then I would have sulked for weeks on end. Those thoughts are brief now, and cooler thoughts come into play. Being adult! But for a few hours today, I lost my mind completely. 

Silly really, with more important things going on in the world. I want others to be heard and to share their experiences. What I say, think and do, people are indifferent to anyway. It’s the people that turn up to our group that deserve their chance to be heard. The facilitators don’t run the group for our benefit; that’s the beauty of how the group runs so well, the chance to be heard. 

Things do wrong from time to time, I realise that. Being autistic though, makes me less tolerant of those mishaps. I need to learn to brush them off and move on. We can all learn from this and move on to next Thursday’s group. I have no axes to grind against anyone or anything. It was just one of those mornings where things don’t go as planned. 

Calmer now…much calmer.

Allen Brooks xx